Patience is a Virtue

Has anyone ever told you “patience is a virtue”? Have you ever stopped to think about what that really means?

I think I’m pretty patient most of the time, but when it comes to driving, I turn into a totally different person. I used to sit in the infamous LA traffic every single morning and every single evening. It would take me at least an hour to get wherever I was going (no further than 30 miles!) and sometimes two hours. I can understand the frustration in these situations. You just want to get there already! But these days I work from home so my “commute” consists of getting out of bed and turning on the computer. I might get in the car once a day, usually not even that often. So how is that I still turn into a seething ball of aggravation when I get on the road?!

I might be going just a few minutes down the road to the grocery store, get stuck behind a sloooow driver and find myself angrily grumbling about the dangers of driving below the speed limit. What?!?

Or maybe I’m entering the freeway and the lane is merging but the car in front of me hasn’t figured that out yet. “That guy’s clueless!”

How about when you’re behind someone who is brake happy even when there’s no reason to slow down or stop?! I’ve been known to speed up and get myself far away from that type.

And one of my pet peeves…leaving your signal on for decades and not going anywhere. “Hellooooo change lanes already!”

These are all pretty ridiculous (and quite irrational) reactions to very minimal situations. So what gives?

Patience, by definition, is tolerance and acceptance of delay, difficulty and mistakes…here’s the kicker…WITHOUT becoming agitated or upset. It is the quiet hope and trust that things will turn out right.

Think about it: eventually, we will all make it to our destination. And it’s ok that not everyone is as good a driver as me. (I kid.) Now let’s be clear, there’s a wide gap between maniacal road rage and “Sunday driving” and I think we should all aim to be somewhere in between so as to minimize irritation for all.  And now I’m not just talking about on the road…

Our world has become saturated with this idea of “instant gratification”. We want to be rewarded right now and when that doesn’t happen, “road rage” sets in. We are plagued by selfishness and mistrust so we look out for ourselves. And when someone gets in the way of our selfish desires, “road rage” sets in.

Wouldn’t it be nice to slow things down, feel less stressed, exercise better decision making, and develop some empathy and compassion? Yes? Ok, time for us all to practice PATIENCE!! Easier said than done of course, so now I understand why “Patience is a virtue”.

So here’s what I’m going to do next time I get on the road and feel impatience begin to boil inside:

•            Take deep slow breaths and count to 10. This will slow your heart rate and relax your body.
•      Give yourself a pep talk. Remind yourself that everything will be ok and that being impatient won’t speed things along. Do something to distract you from the cause of your impatience. Read the Bible verses below.
•      Settle into the moment. Accept the things you can’t change (we hear this all the time).
•      Think big picture. Will this matter to me later today? Tomorrow? Next month? Next year? Hint: Probably not!
•      Stop demanding perfection of yourself. Oftentimes, we are putting the pressure on ourselves and it’s not necessary.
•      Actively practice patience. (This is the hardest one!) Put yourself into situations that require you to be patient. The next time you go to the grocery store, get in the longest line. Instead of going to the ATM at the bank, go inside.

Bible Verses on Patience: 

“For the revelation awaits an appointed time; it speaks of the end and will not prove false. Though it linger, wait for it; it will certainly come and will not delay.” Habakkuk 2:3

“But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.” Romans 8:25

“Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.” Romans 12:12

“And endurance produces character, and character produces hope.” Romans 5:4

“A hot-tempered man stirs up strife, but he who is slow to anger quiets contention.” Proverbs 15:18